Lord, this feels like a war.
Battles unceasing.
Years of looking normal and healthy.
“You look great!”
But collapsing into Your strength.
Fighting inside, invisible symptoms.
Nerve synapses on fire.
Cells attacking each other.
Cycles of exhaustion and bravely trying.
Spiritual warfare.
Guide my thoughts according to Your Word!
Am I supposed to be at war with my decaying body, a “chronic illness warrior?”
The body You created for me?
War?
Or peace?
War and peace?
“Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace” (Eph. 6:14-15 ESV).
Draw me nearer, nearer, nearer, blessed Lord,
To the cross where Thou hast died;
Draw me nearer, nearer, nearer, blessed Lord,
To Thy precious, bleeding side.
(Crosby, F., 1875)
Peace in submission to You as Your beloved in Christ, not war in rebellion against You
When peace like a river attendeth my way…
“Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done” (Lk. 22:42 ESV).
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say,
"It is well, it is well with my soul.”
(Spafford, H. G., 1873)
“Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you” (Jas. 4:7 ESV).
Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
let this blest assurance control:
that Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
and has shed his own blood for my soul!
Remind me of my identity in Christ, not chronic illness and pain!
All to Jesus I surrender,
all to him I freely give;
may I ever love and trust him,
in his presence daily live.
(Van DeVenter, J. W., 1896)
Consecrate me now to Thy service, Lord,
By the pow’r of grace divine;
Let my soul look up with a steadfast hope,
And my will be lost in Thine.
“In all circumstances
take up the shield of faith,
with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one” (Eph. 6:16 ESV).
“For we are his workmanship,
created in Christ Jesus for good works,
which God prepared beforehand,
that we should walk in them” (Eph. 2:10 ESV)!
Your grace-filled gift of personal worship as my “good work”…into the spiritual warfare chronic illness and pain can bring
I may need to worship You alone, unable to be with others.
Not alone, but with You.
Flat in bed.
Resting.
“By the mercies of God…present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect” (Rom. 12:1-2 ESV).
Change my thoughts as I rest with You, Lord Jesus! Transform, renew, stay my mind according to Your perfect will, as You intercede for me!
All to Jesus I surrender,
make me, Savior, wholly thine:
may thy Holy Spirit fill me,
may I know thy pow'r divine.
Holy Spirit, bring Your offensive weapon, Your Word, to mind when I’m physically unable to read it…
“and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God” (Eph. 6:17 ESV)…
“and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Phil. 4:7 ESV).
All to Jesus I surrender,
Lord, I give myself to thee;
fill me with thy love and power,
let thy blessing fall on me.
War against self-pity, a “prayer warrior” replacing a “chronic illness warrior” identity
Father, today, I declare war on any fixation on myself as a chronic illness warrior.
Sin’s temptation rises within this false identity and narrative of my life.
“For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace” (Rom. 8:6 ESV).
My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
my sin, not in part, but the whole,
is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more;
praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
By Your grace, please, please make me a prayer warrior instead!
“Praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end, keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints” (Eph. 6:18 ESV).
Oh, the pure delight of a single hour
That before Thy throne I spend,
When I kneel in prayer, and with Thee, my God,
I commune as friend with friend!
“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil” (Eph. 6:10-11 ESV).
Sweet hour of prayer! sweet hour of prayer!
that calls me from a world of care,
and bids me at my Father's throne
make all my wants and wishes known.
In seasons of distress and grief,
my soul has often found relief,
and oft escaped the tempter's snare
by thy return, sweet hour of prayer!
(Walford, W. W., 1845)
Glorifying You in this body’s spiritual warfare, resting in Your grace to endure to the end
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” (1 Pet. 5:8 CSB).
There are depths of love that I cannot know
Till I cross the narrow sea;
There are heights of joy that I may not reach
Till I rest in peace with Thee.
“Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world” (1 Pet. 5:9 CSB).
O Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
the clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
the trump shall resound and the Lord shall descend;
even so, it is well with my soul.
“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ,
will himself
restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.
To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen” (1 Pet. 5:10-11 CSB)!
A music therapy-inspired podcast of these Scriptures and hymns, to help with our pain and symptom flares
In moments of battling symptoms, I’m praying the music therapy-inspired podcast of these Scriptures and hymns will be God’s healing gift of grace to you. I've had much nerve pain lately, and thank God that He gave me some 1-2 pain scale moments to create this podcast! See instructions in the podcast show notes about breathing to the music and how it can help your body rest as your soul and mind also rest. I’m joining you!
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